Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Past my Prime in Soccer? Or Just a Victim of Circumstance?
We UT guys had our friendly match with BK's team on Sunday. and we lost 3-1. needless to say it was another game i'll want to forget in a hurry. Our team just wasn't good enough, period. I realize I have been quite a bit of an alibi freak. The very kind of person I used to loathe. The type of guy who would blame failure or poor performance on everything else except himself. I could cite the fact that we were missing numerous players, Hafidz, Rosita, Yuandong, Deyuan, Kangwei etc so much so that Thad had to bring in a couple of his frens. Also everyone on our team was rather attack minded and we had no defence. Or i could also state the fact that i've been sick for 3 weeks and not yet recovered when i was asked to play under the scorching hot orb which we call the sun. I could blame it on the fact that i have been working and not getting as much exercise and hence my stamina has suffered compared to the rest of my frens. But none of these can make me feel even a tiny bit better. You see, I am my own biggest critic. Every misplaced pass, every missed chance, every poor touch... I am the one who's the most disappointed. It finally hit me that the same friends who used to come to me for advise on soccer and for encouragement are surpassing me in many areas. And since i've come back to Sg i just havent had a decent game to show for. Am i too harsh on myself? Or am i truly past it?
Monday: Day Off from Work
Went to CMPB to have my ENT medical review on Monday. As it turns out, my hearing is normal. For whatever weird reason, the first time around the audio tests conducted seem to point out that i have a hearing problem. This time around, although i didn't feel any different, the testers said my hearing is normal on their machine, so as yet i am still confused as to why I had to come back for the review. Not to forget that as a result of this gaffe I've had to wait an extra 7 weeks, postponing my enlistment date. Despite being otherwise fine in every area of my medical, they still classified me under PES B rather than A, the medic citing under sports history the torn ankle ligaments i suffered in 1997 as the reason. well, good thing is at least i don't have to downgrade, i can still partake in regular national service and still qualify for Officer Cadet School if I were selected. Am still not sure of my enlistment date, but more and more of the ppl i've met have already started asking: "so when are you enlisting?" or "when are you going in for NS?" etc.
Met up with YD @ Holland V. in the p.m. for tea. We chatted for like 3 plus hours at Delifrance. Quite scary how us guys can be so chatty eh. neways, he's heading back to T.O. next week with his sis and they're gonna move into our apartment at (3 minus 2) Park Lane. :P Was complaining about furniture moving and stuff. Funny guy that buddy of mine, but i guess that's what makes us click.
Bad Dreams
Woke up this morning from a rather unpleasant sleep. Dreamt about "you know who" which was rather weird considering the fact that I no longer feel anything towards her and I have let this issue go for a long time now. I guess there prob was smthg or some feeling that was still surpressed inside me. Some sort of frustration at the situation or state of our friendship perhaps. Was thinking whether I should send a note of apology for messing up our friendship with what i did. But then i changed my mind cuz i realized in her mind it'd prob be more like "what friendship? there never was any between us."
We UT guys had our friendly match with BK's team on Sunday. and we lost 3-1. needless to say it was another game i'll want to forget in a hurry. Our team just wasn't good enough, period. I realize I have been quite a bit of an alibi freak. The very kind of person I used to loathe. The type of guy who would blame failure or poor performance on everything else except himself. I could cite the fact that we were missing numerous players, Hafidz, Rosita, Yuandong, Deyuan, Kangwei etc so much so that Thad had to bring in a couple of his frens. Also everyone on our team was rather attack minded and we had no defence. Or i could also state the fact that i've been sick for 3 weeks and not yet recovered when i was asked to play under the scorching hot orb which we call the sun. I could blame it on the fact that i have been working and not getting as much exercise and hence my stamina has suffered compared to the rest of my frens. But none of these can make me feel even a tiny bit better. You see, I am my own biggest critic. Every misplaced pass, every missed chance, every poor touch... I am the one who's the most disappointed. It finally hit me that the same friends who used to come to me for advise on soccer and for encouragement are surpassing me in many areas. And since i've come back to Sg i just havent had a decent game to show for. Am i too harsh on myself? Or am i truly past it?
Monday: Day Off from Work
Went to CMPB to have my ENT medical review on Monday. As it turns out, my hearing is normal. For whatever weird reason, the first time around the audio tests conducted seem to point out that i have a hearing problem. This time around, although i didn't feel any different, the testers said my hearing is normal on their machine, so as yet i am still confused as to why I had to come back for the review. Not to forget that as a result of this gaffe I've had to wait an extra 7 weeks, postponing my enlistment date. Despite being otherwise fine in every area of my medical, they still classified me under PES B rather than A, the medic citing under sports history the torn ankle ligaments i suffered in 1997 as the reason. well, good thing is at least i don't have to downgrade, i can still partake in regular national service and still qualify for Officer Cadet School if I were selected. Am still not sure of my enlistment date, but more and more of the ppl i've met have already started asking: "so when are you enlisting?" or "when are you going in for NS?" etc.
Met up with YD @ Holland V. in the p.m. for tea. We chatted for like 3 plus hours at Delifrance. Quite scary how us guys can be so chatty eh. neways, he's heading back to T.O. next week with his sis and they're gonna move into our apartment at (3 minus 2) Park Lane. :P Was complaining about furniture moving and stuff. Funny guy that buddy of mine, but i guess that's what makes us click.
Bad Dreams
Woke up this morning from a rather unpleasant sleep. Dreamt about "you know who" which was rather weird considering the fact that I no longer feel anything towards her and I have let this issue go for a long time now. I guess there prob was smthg or some feeling that was still surpressed inside me. Some sort of frustration at the situation or state of our friendship perhaps. Was thinking whether I should send a note of apology for messing up our friendship with what i did. But then i changed my mind cuz i realized in her mind it'd prob be more like "what friendship? there never was any between us."
yeongest 9:22 am