An Endless Stream of Consciousness

Another week is gone. Spent the whole of yesterday at the Stadium yet again, this time for the NDP '06 Preview. Didn't really get the freedom to roam about though this time, as I was mostly accompanying my S3 as he walked the ground finding stuff to do.

Based on the one day i spent with him yesterday, I've come to realize that my boss is a rather simple man. The only 2 things he dislike are betrayal and lies. Apart from that he only wants to have his own time and not be bothered by anyone/anything. The usual image of him blowing his top at anyone in sight is not as befitting anymore. But then again, it is never safe to tread into areas which you know he dislike. Well at least i know I certainly don't intend to.

This past week i have also seen more and more of my pals leave the battalion (either via disruption for studies or ORD). It can't help but make me anxious. When will my time come? it just seems forever and ever. And as i am now the battalion's events coordinator, i see a lot of things coming up in the next few months after NDP, which means our battalion doesn't even get its deserved break.

It may well be true that more things/responsibilities come to ppl/units that are more capable than others, but sometimes ppl have to realize that everyone needs a break. we can't function at our peak when we are expected to be running all the time.

I want to O-R-D. Four words that mean so much to all the NSFs throughout the history of Singaporean men since the army was formed. (fine so a while back it used to be R.O.D. rather than O.R.D., but it still equates to end of full-time army life).

I really don't know what it takes to maintain a positive attitude. Just when you think that not being scolded by your bosses will bring you happiness, you suddenly realize that having your bosses like you could sometime be even worse. Remember my big boss? CO of the battalion? well this past week i had a few brushes with "trouble" if you know what i mean, due to my newbie-ness as a dy S3. Firstly, the training programme schedule for the month of July apparently hadn't been signed yet, secondly, just yesterday, my CO called me while I was doing a site recce just to inform me that the Battalion workplan wasn't updated. Sloppy work on my part? perhaps. But then again my answer to his enquiries were honest and simple. "Sir, I have not received any updates regarding these events, that's why they are not reflected in the workplan."

Normally, these sort of answers coming from other ppl would warrant a scene not fit for the viewing of children under the age of 12. However, in this case, i was surprised to hear his reply. "oh really? hmmm ok. never mind later you just go and amend it when you find out." I was surprised to say the least. My S3 (immediate boss) must've seen the expression on my face though, because he asked me "eh why? what did he want?" I told him exactly what happened and he gave me a wry smile. "Aiyah, CO won't scold you one lah. He loves you..."

I didn't know how to react at this comment. However, I have heard from quite a substantial number of ppl that CO & S3 thinks rather highly of me, that is why I have gotten my new post as DyS3 in the first place. I dunno why but at that moment i felt like crying inside of me. I mean, don't get me wrong, i was nowhere near tears, but this part of me feels torn. On the one hand, i have succeeded in not having my two supposedly "fierce" and "terrifying" bosses scold me for the mistakes i make, but on the otherhand, the amount of sai kang and responsibility they throw my way sometimes makes it unbearable. So tell me ppl... how??

Went to watch Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest with my family today. I sort of had high expectations ever since I fell in love with the first movie. Well, i guess it kinda back-fired cause this second one really bombed. Not only did i think they "forced" the audience into watching another sequel with certain missing answers, the plot was also poorly organized and not as neatly structured as the first one. I guess that's the way sequels work anyway. Only 1 out of 10 usually live up to expectations.

It has been an interesting few weeks since i assumed my role as the Dy S3 in HQ coy. I have experienced some new things. I guess some of it is expected, but I have also come to know how important the role of the Dy S3 is. I can only hope that I would've properly learned the ropes by the time my other project officer pal in S3 branch disrupts and goes for his studies. On hindsight, it probably was true when my CO said that we really do not have anyone else right now in the Battalion who could assume the Dy ops officer role. But sometimes, somehow, I just wish it didn't have to be the case...

Another sickening penalty shoot-out loss for England... I guess i have accepted the fact that England will never ever win on penalties. But that still didn't make it any less disappointing.

*sigh* Wayne wayne... when will u learn to curb that temper? You already have bags of talent beyond most players at your age, so much so that the hopes of an entire nation rest on your shoulder. And you just had to crush all those hopes with one moment of madness. Oh well, another 4 yrs to wait, another disappointing finale to a world cup.

this yr's world cup is even more disappointing than before. All time favourite's brazil did not even make it to the semis this time. What is the footballing world coming to?