Tuesday, November 23, 2004
5.07pm on a Tuesday afternoon. It's almost exactly a week till the last day of my stay here in EDB. The rain is coming down in torrents against the panes of our office window here at Raffles City Tower. I never thought that the weather could be such an accurate reflection of one's emotions. She's attending a meeting now... which means i won't be seeing her anymore at all at least until tomorrow nite. I dunno why but suddenly I have this really strong urge to bawl my eyes out. I really do.
I am not one who bursts out crying any time i feel like it, but this time I'm fighting really hard to hold back my emotions. I guess our emotions are a funny thing given to us from up above. Many times you can't really put them into words. But when your heart is given to another, you can suddenly feel what the other feels. Yet though I can be a very expressive person (with my emotions) in general, I find that something is holding me back from telling her what I feel. Is it really true that some things are better left unsaid? If it is indeed true like she said that she feels what i feel, then she should know what i have to say already.
Why is it that she can always sense it when I am bothered by something? And how is it that I find it so hard to put into words what I think? Regardless, I already told her last nite. If there is one thing I know from the bottom of my heart it is that I don't want to lose her. But I know for certain that our relationship is still young and we are still finding our feet, and there will be many obstacles along the way. Yet she is already starting to mean more to me than any worldly thing. I really need the wisdom and the courage to pull through. And with all my hope I pray that she will feel the same and do so too.
I am not one who bursts out crying any time i feel like it, but this time I'm fighting really hard to hold back my emotions. I guess our emotions are a funny thing given to us from up above. Many times you can't really put them into words. But when your heart is given to another, you can suddenly feel what the other feels. Yet though I can be a very expressive person (with my emotions) in general, I find that something is holding me back from telling her what I feel. Is it really true that some things are better left unsaid? If it is indeed true like she said that she feels what i feel, then she should know what i have to say already.
Why is it that she can always sense it when I am bothered by something? And how is it that I find it so hard to put into words what I think? Regardless, I already told her last nite. If there is one thing I know from the bottom of my heart it is that I don't want to lose her. But I know for certain that our relationship is still young and we are still finding our feet, and there will be many obstacles along the way. Yet she is already starting to mean more to me than any worldly thing. I really need the wisdom and the courage to pull through. And with all my hope I pray that she will feel the same and do so too.
yeongest 5:06 pm